Life after this?

I apologize, it has been way too long since I have posted. I can blame it on a number of things, Work, Life, Love and Loss. And have played into this.
Lets start with Work: Summer and Spring = way busy. I love being busy because it makes the time go really fast, which is both a curse and a blessing. I had to stop and remind myself that my kids are all getting older, going into a higher grade. And growing before my eyes. I think I need them to stop...like now lol . Where is my time going??
This next subject can be tied all into Life, Love and Loss, all 3 are changing for me. I find myself in a place in my life where I am alone, but not alone. I have lost the best friend I have ever had, even if it is just temporary. Having heard the words " I don't know if I love you anymore" will forever be burned into my heart. Given the fact that all marriages go through their ups and downs, this is surely a down. Being the God loving wife that I am, I will stand by my vow to love honor and respect my husband through this time. I pray that God softens his heart and brings him back home. Life is hard, there is the stress of money, time, bills, kids, work. I mean the list goes on. I do not blame him for being stressed out or overwhelmed. I don't even blame him for leaving me to take the easy way out of our stressful life.... It is my job as a wife to be here for him when he doesn't think he needs me. I will not abandon my marriage. I will be right here waiting for him with as much love in my heart as when he left it. Because I know he needs that right now.

On December 21 2013, I didn't just Marry my best friend. I married into the Role of a Step Mom to his beautiful kids. I have grown in so many ways because of them. They have shown me the real definition of love. It was a rough road, one that I didn't think I could ride with at some points. I have tested my love, my faith and my patience. But being faced with the idea that I could potentially have my family ripped from me, I thought I could die. Suddenly I regret not saying I love you as many times as I thought it. I wished I hadn't told them to be quiet as much as I did, letting the sound of their laughter echo in my house, being captured in my walls so I could hear it forever. I miss the moments of sitting in the same room, watching a boring movie, but just being happy to be next to them. I love my kids, I love my family, I love my husband.

Lash Party anyone?!?!

So I'm going to be honest. I am coming out of my hibernating state of winter, and getting my Girl back on lol. During the winter I don't really do my hair, nails, face, well any of it. I forget how to be a girl and focus on staying warm, that's just reality. BUT with it being MAY first(can you believe that) I am getting my hair done, next weekend, nails done, next weekend...and my face is getting put back on!

 

I wanted to share with you guys the best thing EVER! its the most amazing Mascara EVER.

My girl Kiya has a instagram page that I found all of this aweseom-ness on. I literally was begging her to put together an online party for me.

So she did!!!!

Here is my link! Shop your little hearts out just like I am. These are the most amazing lashes you will EVER have.
https://www.youniqueproducts.com/KiyaStack/party/1809345/view

The Lashes on the right are Clinique, the lashes on the left are Younique

I mean for REALZ!!!! Time to get my lash on!

Teeth Yanked

So I have been MIA for a few days, I had some wisdom teeth yanked out of my head. Wasn't fun in the slightest. First, I thought I would be put to sleep for that, Nope. Just some numbing gel and laughing gas. In all honesty, I didn't feel much, but I could hear the crunching of the tooth inside of my head, and the pressure of them pulling it out was just too much. I hated it to be honest. Which sucks for me to say but now that my teeth are gone....I am able to get braces. Friggin Braces. At 29...seriously?? they better be clearer than clear cause I am NOT looking forward to being a brace face. And it will have to wait until after December, No body gets braces right before they go to Cabo...No body. With my luck, the flight will be delayed because my mouth will set off the Metal detectors and we wont make our reservation. I know I'm being a brat, I am a little irritable still from the mouth pain.
But to be honest, Sunny Cabo is what I was thinking about the whole time. They had that super bright light all up in my face, gave me some super cool glasses, every once in a while I would get sprayed in the face with some water. That's alright, just the waves coming up to far on the beach.

So truth be told, (this will all make sense) I was having a hard time getting back into my routine of working out all morning, following my meal plan to a T. But now that I can't eat solids for about a week, I told the Dental Hygienist not to fret, I Herbalife, so I wont starve, Long story short, Who leaves the dentist from getting teeth pulled with 4 new clients?? THIS GIRL! woop woop . Turns out the entire office is on vacation During the Holidays and they want to slim up also . ha ha Go me.!

But in all reality, I lost 3 pounds lol. See all I needed was for someone to rip my teeth out of my head forcing me into my awesome eating habits. And now im back.

As for the workouts, Those start on Monday...No need to rush this ;)

Preparing for Cabo

Dang it is going to be SUCH a busy summer! Work definitely kicks my ass this time of year, Herbalife and working out is a high priority, I don't want to be a lard ass when I get to Cabo. And I have to find time for tanning. I need more time in the day I swear. I mean at first I thought that's what weekends are made of. But then I started working 6-7 days a week and ended up planning my randoms in the evening, but then I go to bed late and work up early.....Is this what its supposed to be like?!

But its totally fine...I have 237 to lose 26 more pounds, get tanner, and have my hair grow and not die working my 50-60 hour weeks. oh and work out...Totally worth it. Its days like this when I totally rely on my Herbalife Tea. It burns about 80 calories just to drink it, plus it gives me the uppity feeling I used to chase drinking redbull, only tons better for me.

So going into the summer, its going to be so much different than last year. First of all, I should say out loud finally that I have been sober for 112 days. You guys don't know me so I will say it out loud, I am an alcoholic. This is the longest I have been sober since the day I turned 21. It was a real struggle for me to come this far. I think that is why I relied on working out so much. it took my mind off what I was running from. I took the focus of getting my next drink and started to focus on my next meal, my next pound, my next victory. It consumes me...and this is one addiction I will not kick.
So its strict meal planning, tea and water only, making sure I am on point. By the time Cabo comes around I will be able to look back and literally see my transformation.

Best recipe EVER!!!!

So the other night Matt was going to some class thing for work. This sucked because as always I miss him when he is gone, BUT that meant I could experiment with all of the healthy foods I want, and not feel guilty for borderline poisoning him. So Of course I am "Herbalifing" so I had to find something that was healthy, kinda clean eating and chalk full of goodies...Me, I like sugar ,...and bacon, and noodles. SO I went onto Pinterest and looked for something that was carb free. and holy cats there are a lot of options.

So I scrolled until I found this beauty

 

I knew instantly that I needed to have it, I mean, you had me at bacon but I mean with spinach and spaghetti squash, and cheese. This is like the best healthy dish I have ever had ha ha. My fitness pal says that for one serving it is roughly 300 or so calories. I can definitely live with myself after gorging on this for the next two days! So after having my delicious, tastes like a cheat Meal replacement shake, I got to literally mow down on this. I didn't even care that my son didn't like it, only because I knew I could have more later ha ha ha. Bad Mom!

 

 

CLICK HERE FOR THE RECIPE!!

 

 

CLICK HERE TO LOSE WEIGHT LIKE I DID!!!

So Today i went to the Dentist

Trust me, I've had worse ideas. But it was long over due so I made an appointment and actually showed up. After a 3 hour appointment I walk out of there not feeling half of my face, talking like Sid the Sloth. But lets start with the positives, I have ZERO cavities!!! BUT I have to have quadrant cleaning, 3 separate appointments, and in 8 days I will be back in there for 3 hours while they yank my wisdom teeth out.... Seriously. What did I ever do to them?!? oh and here is the "Best" Part I need fucking braces! sorry about my language mom, but I literally made it to almost 29 years old....what do I get for my birthday?? BRACES?!?!?! but don't worry I wont get them until after cabo....one simply doesn't go to cabo with braces! well I guess I could get clear ones.


So I leave there, go to work feeling like half my face is falling off, sluring my words and my boss is wondering if it was really the dentist I came back from ha ha ha. Listen, im not the kinda person to get drunk at work...any more anyways! which reminds me, I have been sober for 109 days!! Since New years eve I have not had a single sip of alcohol in my body. Which sucks only once a month realistically. I was talking to Matt yesterday about if we were going to drink on our Cabo vacation. I always had the idea that I would be sipping margaritas all day on a vacation...But sober people don't do that. But hey they can make anything a virgin, well except Lindsay Lohan ha ha ha ha.
But back to my melting face, this is just another awesome day, where I can still eat without looking like a dumbass. Thankfully two of my meals are shakes. I owe this to Herbalife lol. And not to mention, I totally wore my Herbalife pin to the dentist, and got two new contacts! How exciting is that!??!

New goals, annnnd Go!

Ok so I had my first go round with Herbalife and actually met my goal. Call me crazy but I set lots of small goals, that way I celebrate more often ha ha. I went to my pounds jar and emptied all the little stones that I moved over from "Pounds to lose" into "Pounds lost" and started all over.

So I had a little bit of a celebration weekend, didn't really gorged, but I had a few cheat meals and I am back on it today. I have to tell you, my gut is not happy that I cheated on my meal plans. I am all kinds of bloated, I can't even suck this in!
But this time I am not doing it alone! My coffee stand beauty Liz actually started with me! I am so excited to see her results! She is getting married this September and is just itching to lose the last bit of weight she has. I just know she will rock this.


Now that it is May, Warmer weather is started to hit the Pacific Northwest. Its just a normal spring, 70 today, 65 and raining tomorrow. We take what we can get lol. But when all else fails and i work too long to be able to float the river, I just keep reminding myself that in 241 days i will be resting my skinny ass on some white sanded beach in Cabo. F*ck ya! worth the lifestyle change, worth the pain of the work out, all worth it.